Survived the bush

Well I made it back from Swansea in one piece (well the outside, inside I was a broken man). so much beer was drank and little food eaten.

We left home at half 7 to pick up the other four stag party members including the stag himself. The journey wasn't to bad to Wales and we did it in about 5 hours, not including the stops for the pick ups, with two stops, the first was half hour in to get breakfast the next was when we were near our destination for a loo break.

We got to the meeting destination at 1pm where we had a pint whilst waiting for the rest of the stag group, there were 11 of us in total and we stayed in the pub for another 5 pints, so I was already on the way to being drunk. when we left the pub we made our way to the farm to get our sleeping arrangements sorted out, we were supposed to be camping out but the weather forecast wasn't to clever so we were herded in to the barn/sports hall where we sorted out sleeping bags and crash mats to sleep on. We had a couple of beers whilst we waited for our mini bus and also a game of football in the hall with a bit of carnage with people getting hit left right and sometimes centre.

We get on the mini bus and head out to Swansea for a few beer and naked women (No naked women though as Swansea has a ban on Strip/lap dance clubs due to members of the council getting caught with said ladies). We get to the first pub and things for me a going ok, the second pub and things are still going great, third place I don't even remember and that's when it goes down hill, I do remember getting asked to leave the club/bar though for smoking in the toilet, I just remember not knowing the way out and in desperate need for a smoke.

after coming round and sobering up a little and after chatting to a girl on a bench I make my way to Mac Donald's for a coffee and something to eat, hopefully some of the alcohol will be soaked up, whilst eating I phone a couple of people from the stag do with no luck as no one is answering their phone, so I sit down wondering what to do when I get a call from another stag member who is lost, I somehow direct him to Mac D's and have a man cuddle, he then gets a bit teary as he is soon going to be a dad and has a lot of built up worry and stress as to if he is going to be a good dad, what will happen to the relationship and we have a great chat which I think he needed and I hope has him sorted for father hood, I only offered advice that I thought that would help and to let him get things of his chest. So after what seemed like hours we find a taxi and ask them to take us back to the farm, trouble is between us we didn't have a clue as to the name of it and the taxi driver just looked at us, after about 15 mins I remembered roughly where it was and once he got us to a certain part I could direct him, the driver wasn't local and neither were we. We finally got back and found out we weren't the first ones back, so we stay up and chatted till the others arrived and had a few more beers.

Waking on Saturday morning wasn't an easy task at 7am, this wasn't by choice, but because the barn had birds flying through it and the sun came in through the windows. It was like a pack rising for the morning though, we were all in various states of pain and looking rough but most of the group got up roughly the same time, ok this might be due to the stag waking up early and making sure everyone else was up to, how did he do this, well there was the morning beer followed by being dragged across the floor or having the ball kicked at you.

about 9am we had breakfast which was quite poor but we ate it anyway as we had no idea when our next meal would be. Once breakfast was eaten we met our guides for the day and we trudged off to the woods for our bush craft day, there wasn't anything really to report about this, when we arrived after carrying our equipment and settled down we were told how to handle the knives we were given and also warned that there was no beer until we handed in our knives, which I can see was a good thing as having 11 pissed up blokes with knives, something is going ot go wrong. We learnt how to make our own tent pegs, how to light fires with bits of wood and not the lighter that I had in my pocket. they taught us how to gut fish and how to tie our hammocks up so we didn't sleep on the ground. at one point I was in desperate need of the loo and unfortunately it wasn't just to go behind the tree, so I got the spade and tissue bag and headed off in to the woods to do my business, which sounds easy but not with a hangover and also the dexterity of an elephant. I finally found a place out of the way and dug my hole and then realised that unless I took my trousers off it was going to be very difficult to squat, so I looked around for a branch that maybe I could lean on and maybe dig myself another hole, but no such luck. Once I realised it wasn't going to be as easy as i thought, I dropped my trousers and just hopped I was aiming in the right place, luckily i did and headed back to camp with a smile on my face and a weight lifted from my shoulders.

Once we had had something to eat three of us headed to town to resupply the beer front, we weren't sure if we would be leaving the site so hadn't brought any but we then realised that we weren't going anywhere. I did a quick calculation and figured that half a case each would be about right so told everyone that 6 cases were needed and a lot of people disagreed and said four would be enough, I know me and a friend can polish of a crate in one evening so I didn't listen to them and we head of and get the supplies. We do stop for a quick beer to pass the time, when we get back to the farm though we realise that 6 cases between 3 is doable until we see the wheelbarrow and chuck all the beer in there, i would like to say the beer survived the journey but unfortunately we lose about 5 bottles so no great lose.

After dinner we all sat round the camp fire talking rubbish and drinking as much beer as possible, it was all friendly banter and not fights broke out. there was a game though that did start on the Friday, I say game, more of a punishment, you had to drink with your left hand, if you got caught drinking with your right you had to down your drink, this worked well at the pub and and around the camp fire as you could spot people, but when out and about the rules seemed to be forgotten. Whilst round the camp fire one chap couldn't stop drinking with his right hand and kept getting punished, but because it was so frequent someone else got roped in to downing their drink at the same time, the chap they picked though was the biggest of the group and we thought this would dissuade the repeat offender but this tactic didn't work, so then the stag was also on the punishment list and they thought they had cracked but did. The stag and large group member took repeat offender in to the wood to "have a word" with him this worked for a while but the punishments were dished out again.

So after a great evening we woke to it pouring down hard and everyone looking very tired and hungover, we managed to get everything packed up quickly in the morning and headed back to the cars and showers for our return journey.

A piece of advice "don't travel for 6 hours in a car with another 5 hungover men, the noises and smells are unpleasant.

It's been awhile

I know I was going to update about our weekend at Haven but I never got round to it.

I will say that it was a good weekend and I would love to do it again and that my son loved every minute of it, even going to bed as he was so tired.

So what's been happening, not much really, the gf and i have been getting on ok, sex life is sort of there, I could complain but I won't. My mum vcame over at the weekend so we caught up with her in the day just so she could see her grandson then in the evening my brother and I had dinner out with my mum which was nice and we got to spend a couple of hours as a family.

Past few weeks we have been going to school fairs etc, my son has loved all of it, he has also started football training every Saturday morning that I take him to. It is an hour and a half long and he loves it, a few of his friends have been but aren't keen after a couple of sessions but my son keeps asking when he is next going so is loving it. Past three weeks he has one a prise for either being man of the match or just a medal of excellence for the effort and sportsmanship he puts in and each time he went up I would have this big smile on my face.

This weekend I am off to Wales for a stage do, we are going here Shaggy Sheep. We are leaving at 7am and should be there for about 1pm, I am hoping that there won't be any beer in the car as would like to be semi with it when we go out in the evening, but I am sure I will cave to peer pressure if there is beer that early on.

So I am still around and will report back on how the stag do went next week, take it easy.