The Travel, The Fussing, The Funeral and The Car Alarm

Well last Tuesday me and my bro ended up driving to Glasgow for my Grans funeral.

I live on the Kent coast so this adds normally 1-2hrs journey time to wherever you are going north or London.

As flights were stupid prices (I found out this was due to the UEFA cup being held in Glasgow, played by two Spanish teams) we decided to drive up and seeing as my car isn't running correctly at the mo (Petrol gauge is screwed and the AC isn't working properly) I asked my mum if we can borrow the company car which luckily she agreed to and so did her hubby (they run the company together) but I was under instruction by my step dad not to let my brother smoke in the car. So when i finally find the office, they forgot to tell me they had moved it round the corner I parked up and waited to be picked up as my brother had to pick the car up local to him. We left the office at just after 7 when the fussing began, first text of the evening "Have you left yet", it was my mum, so I replied and off we went, first stop garage, we need supplies oh and petrol (which luckily we were putting on account), so i buy the usual, four bottles of pop, crisps, cigs and king size rizzla.

So we started the trip quite well no arguing and things, i got the ipod working through the radio at last so it was all good.

My brother did most of the driving on the way up and we changed twice. Once after we had tried to get some food, he got back in the car then the next services asked me to take over which I did, then we changed again when we filled up with petrol as I couldn't keep my eyes open and he had slept for an hour or so when it had been my turn.

We finally arrived at our hotel just after 2am, so I text my mum, not sure how many this was after but i had made her worry abit telling her we didn't have shirts and ties for the funeral and i didn't actually have a suit either.

Once in the hotel the bar was packed, it was full of Spanish football supports, I wanted to have a beer but thought that with the early start the next day it would not be a good idea. So once in the room we roll a joint each and have a pleasant smoke. as i was no longer tired from the journey I ended up watching Basket ball till 4am.

So Wednesday morning we wake up and its the first time i have seen Scotland in the daylight for 4/5 years and its looking great, the hills are looking extremely green and the contrasts of them to the grey clouds looks amazing, we go down to breakfast about half 8 and have a full breakkie. We leave about 9/half 9 and travel in to Glasgow city centre to pick up a couple of shirts and ties and a suit. As soon as we are in the car I get a call from my mum saying that we should pop to the asda/tesco store and have a look in there so I almost hangup on her before saying everything is in hand. Still traveling round Glasgow as roads have been closed etc due to the football we end up in the St. Enoch centre and I see s sign for debenhams but as we are heading for it we pop in to Tie Rack and get our ties, I ask where the nearest suit/jacket shop is and he points us in the direction of burtons which is next door. We go in and spot a trouser and jacket set, I try the jacket on but its to tight, so I try another on and it fits, I look at the price and its £75 for the jacket or £99 with the trousers to instead for £120 I think, so I try the trousers on and they fit so I grab two shirts, one each and go and pay, they try to sell me their Burtons card which I say no, they try again so I say no, it must be thirds the charm as once again they ask and I still refuse, finally we get our stuff and leave. Parking for all this time is 40p I think we must have been 10-20Min's max.

We finally get on the road to go to my aunt to meet my mum and Aunt. When we get there mum is still fussing 9its her way of coping) she moans at the way we look, that we haven't shaved blah blah blah, well I know I have shaved and my aunt checks and tell my mum that we have shaved, we are also wearing jeans, t-shirts and trainers, so we go off and get changed. When we come back in I can tell our mum is proud of us as she has us lined up and having our pictures taken.


So we head off to my Papa's house where we meet up with my other cousin and Aunt and play the waiting game. The hearse and Limo turn up on time 2pm and we get in Limo others in the car and we head off to the Crematorium, I am in the front seat of the limo and my papa is behind me and i can tell he is having problems in holding himself in and i feel so sorry for him, luckily my Mum and aunts are in the back with him and comfort him.

We get to the crematorium and there's a delay with the service in front of us so we have to wait a while before we go in. Whilst waiting there is a queue of people wanting to go in, I don't recognise any of them but they are friends/family of my gran and papa. We finally get inside and the service starts (we are in what they call the Old Part, its a very typical building for the Highlands in Redbrick but great design. ). I think this is the best service I personally have been to, the reason for this is there was no eulogy, the Minister mentioned everything that would have been mentioned in the Eulogy but without the closeness and the breakdown alot of people have when speaking at funerals. I don't mean any disrespect but I feel with out the eulogy I can cope better as there is a slight bit less of the personal touch.

Once the Funeral is over we make our way outside where i meet alot of people that remember me from when I was a "we man" and visiting my grandparents in Scotland and me not having a clue who they were, I also met more family members from my Gran's side, her sisters and such.

Once that was all done it was off to the The Miners Welfare Social club In Kirkintilloch, now Kirky is a bit of a dive, I don't know what has caused this or it has been like this ever since I was a kid but it seems more run down than normal and breaks my heart a bit, but the views from the houses in this area are amazing, behind them they have this mass of hills that go for miles and up for miles, the tops disappearing in the clouds(in the summer they look even more amazing). When we walk in there is a pot of soup on the go and tea and coffee being served, now I'm not used to this and not sure if it is a tradition or not but hey when in Rome. After having a snack on the buffet and talking to the family its time for a beer. Once that is in hand off to the pool tables where I beat my brother 2 nil.

Everyone starts to leave around 5ish so I head back to my papa's house and have a cup of tea about 10 cigs and talk about the past, I then get change back to jeans etc for the drive home. We have to give my mum a lift back to my aunts as that is where she is stay and also there is no room in my aunts car, we get back there where my brother decides it would be a good idea to get changed.

We finally leave about 7ish and hit the road, my brother starts the first part of the journey and I fall asleep about for half hour to an hour, we pull in to the services about half 9 and have something to eat and a smoke, we leave about 10 and i am now in the driving seat, we pull in to Oxford services about 12am for a smoke break (my brother has been alseep all this time). We are heading back and the M26 is closed so we have a detour and finally get back to my car just after 2 (yup another 8/9 hour journey done in 7). We roll a joint smoke that and i drop him off home and go home my self. I have now hit my second wind when i get in so I get the duvet and head to the sofa where I stay up till 5am watching baseball.

In the morning I'm not relling to bad I look at my watch and its about half 8, I have already told work I am going to be in late, but i make the mistake of sitting down and closing my eyes, I awake at half 11, feeling like crap i call work and tell them i won't be in which they are fine about.

As I now have the day free, myself, the gf and my son head in to town to meet her mum for lunch. We then visit shops etc and i am so borded of this now, we finally leave and pop to sainsburys and get a couple of bits for dinner, when we get back to the car I push the remote and nothing, strange it locked the car when we left. I try again, the red light flashes on the key fob but still nothing, now i start walking round the car trying the button and still nothing. Is there something blocking signal, I have no idea, I am starting to think maybe the alarm isn't working so I unlock the door with the keys and suddenly and eye piercing alarm goes off, yup its mine. There's nothing i can do about it so i keep trying and the bloody thing will not go off. I tell the gf that we need to pop to the car shop in town, maybe I need a new battery or something, we get to the shop and i tell the chap and he says it may just be a new battery needed, so he replaces the battery and I ask him it that will reset the fob, he says it shouldn't and he mentions that if it is the key fob having problems it's going to be expensive to correct. Well weather it did or not I do not know as the bloody thing still didn't work. Luckily I had the alarm instructions with me and after reading them once I tried what it said for putting in the pin to turn the alarm off, this didn't work, so I read them again but properly this time and guess what, yup this time it worked and we can go home.

Once home I reset the code on the fob and all is good now (well till next time anyway).